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  • Writer's picturemarikenney

Outlet.

Updated: Jul 6, 2023

Recently, we moved thousands of miles across the country*, a large undertaking. Yet, we survived.


Sandstorms and all.


Since arriving, I've decided to dive deeper into myself and break away the sharp edges of myself that haven't been dulled by time and experience. I'm enjoying the process of shedding my past self - not that it is all good all the time just that it continues showing me how I can better myself and the world around me.


Also, I feel like in my 20's, I was kind of an asshole, so it's nice to try to right what past dumbass self did.


Now, in this shedding process, I've found frustration. Frustration in having no idea how to pull out all these emotions and direct them to where they need to go. I believe that a person's emotions create energy - be it mental or physical - and if that energy doesn't have a clear path to follow, it latches to the scars of the past and digs up the scenes already played through even though, there is no need in repeating. When I fall into this emotional chaos, I find myself becoming a sad, sack of doom scrolling - energy is wasted and I feel like shit.


I don't like that version of myself. So I've decided to do something about it.


Don't know what that thing is just yet, but I'll find it.


I'll try to keep updating this blog for my sanity.


We'll see how that works out for everyone involved.



*Be on the lookout for some blogs motivated by the trip. We saw a lot of things. Listened to a lot of things.






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